My Take on Jennifer's Body.. tsk tsk

hotFor all you Megan Fox fans out there, here’s my two cents on that new movie Jennifer’s Body. It’s rated R, but i’ll tell you why. No it’s not because we see Fox naked… it’s because they use the “F word” in every other sentence and there is a lot of blood. The movie itself can can be described in two words, It’s Horrible. You may be all like, well she makes out with another girl. But in reality, it stinks. No questions asked. I shouldn’t go and waste 10 dollars on this movie. i rather go watch Cloudy with a chance of meatballs.

Warning, this will be a spoiler… so if you still want to see that movie, I suggest not to read from here on out.

So the story is a follows, Jennifer (Megan Fox) wants to go see this band in a “club”. from the minute i saw that band i could tell something was up with that. Then Jennifer tells them she would go buy them some drinks, while she is doing that, the band members are asking eachother if they think she’s a virgin. At this point, we all could only think why they wanted to know that.. they wanted to get in her pants….  Then out of nowhere, a fire breaks loose in the bar, it’s burned down to the ground and the only survivors are Jennifer, her friend ‘Needy’ and that crazy band that comes out of nowhere.

The band members invite Jennifer into their van (that’s a no no Megan Fox… didn’t your mom teach you better?) and drive off. Her friend Neddy is freaking out and goes home. When she gets there, the doorbell rings (the only partly scary part in the movie) and she goes to answer… no one is there. she closes the door and BAM there she is, Jennifer all cut up and bleeding… She looks at Needy and goes to the fridge to try and eat something. She looks like a monster by now… then she pukes some black ooze that no one could tell what it was..

Later on the movie, people (mainly boys) have been brutally killed, they had their stomach opened up and their intestines all eaten.. (yea, that’s a turn off) Then, Jennifer goes and tells Needy the story of what happened to her that night of the fire…

So what happened was, the band members needed a virgin to sacrifice to the devil in order to become a famous band.. yea demonic movie, it was horrible. So, they believe Jennifer is a virgin when in reality she hasn’t been a virgin since she was in middle school. (in the movie, not in real life.. well….) and then all she remembers is being brutally stabbed and killed. Then she said she woke up and found her way back to Needy. and she said that when she’s full she doesn’t feel pain and she heals quick.

Yeah i’m boring you I know.. So to make a long boring story short, Needy researches what happened. So what happened was that when they sacrificed Jennifer, she wasn’t a virgin. So when that happens, the devil still accepts the sacrifice, but a demon comes and lives in the body of the person.. Bingo, yea Megan Fox was a flesh-eating demon….

Really Megan Fox? Like of all the movies you can do, you want to be a demon? Words can’t describe how horrible that movie was.. Words can’t describe how much Megan fox went down in my hotness level with that stupid retarded stunt.

Sorry if I was mean, but reality is movies like that shouldn’t even be allowed to show in theaters of how horrible it was.

Thankfully, I complained and got my money back.


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